So here's what's going on..

Ok, I am going to start flat out by admitting that I can be a jerk sometimes. That being said, other people can be jerks too. I know I am fat, I know I am unhealthy, I know I complain, but you know what? I am also more successful than most of the people who criticize me. I have achieved quite a bit. Yes, I know you guys have jobs or whatever but that doesn't make you better than me. At all. Because I am still in school aiming for a career to do something that's important to me. I have a piece of music published at UNT. I have dozens of songs written and ready to be recorded. I am musically talented. I write in my free time and hopefully something worthy of all my time will be published of that as well. I am sick of hearing that my life is not together because in reality, it's probably more together than most of the people trashing me all the fucking time. I have actually decided on a career and don't change it based on whatever TV show is popular at the time (maybe I could be a Real Housewife....) and I know that's what some people do. I don't think it's cool of anybody to talk about me behind my back either but I know it happens. If I have a problem with something, you know I will say it. I posted a status a few weeks ago that I probably shouldn't have but in all reality, I am taking advice from Sam. Even though we aren't exactly on good terms right now, I still respect her. Why? Because she knows what she wants to do. She also told me this "i may be a bitch for telling you otherwise, but if i have to be the bitch who gets you thinking about your life and the things you have to do to change...then I will." This is an actual quote from a message she sent me. So if I offended anyone, I am sorry but at the same time I feel you guys could achieve so much more if you actually tried. And that's my problem. I just don't understand the level of what you think is fair and what I think is fair anymore. It's 'ok' for all of you guys to place bets on when you think I am going to quit and move back home but I say one thing and I am an asshole. If you think life is hard now, try it in 5 years when you are on your own with no real job and no education. I have told you guys in the past that I feel it's important to try. Coming from me this all probably sounds like hypocrisy but whatever. Long story short... I lost a lot of friends recently for standing up for what I believe in. Don't like it? Then too bad. I am sick of being pushed around. I hope you all take some of this into consideration although I am almost positive no one will read this besides my mom. Hi mom.